2024 Can F*ck Itself

Or, I don't know which is worse, this year's scars or next year's battles

[The title of this post is a nod to the AMC series Kevin Can F*ck Himself, which Bill and I devoured years after its cancelation, and I highly recommend it.]

You may recall I overflowed with optimism at the start of this year. My book was coming out, and I hoped it would open some new doors for me professionally. I had two more books under contract. I had a lot of travel on the calendar, both to support the book and for personal enjoyment. And my day job promised a lot of new developments.

Fast forward to today. Book promo schedules exhausted me and I plummeted into a summer depression. My book contracts were canceled. My position at my day job (along with about 7 of my colleagues) has been eliminated effective in June. I developed an anxiety disorder requiring medication. And, the election.

There were bright spots, and they were exceptionally bright. Going backstage to meet Kylie Minogue at her Vegas residency! Winning a City of Los Angeles Department of Cultural Affairs Individual Master Artist Project Fellowship to support the writing of a new book! Going to London and Milan and feeling so inspired and energized by the world beyond our borders!

But I’m left with a lingering sour taste in my mouth about it all. The day before I won the IMAP Fellowship, I asked Bill if I should give up on writing.

I took the notification email as a sign I shouldn’t. And, technically, couldn’t.

As the year closes, I think of Zora Neale Hurston’s line, “There are years that ask, and years that answer.” I don’t know which this one was. Maybe there’s a secret third kind: years that just suck.

One thing that fell off through all of this was Nanogram, which I always promised was sporadic, but I really tested the definition of that term, didn’t I? In true Charlie fashion, I’ll recommit to this next year. 2025 is going to be wild, full of change, and, I hope, full of opportunity. Maybe I’ll reveal it all here as it happens.

One thing you can expect: a new feature! I’m calling it the Writer’s Style Guide, and I’ve asked writers with some of my favorite approaches to style and fashion to write a little bit about what it means to them. I’ll roll those out and what I hope is a regular basis. But with my sporadic approach to this, please be gentle with me.

One other bright spot on the 2025 horizon: I’m joining PocketMFA as a mentor for poetry in the Winter term. Applications are open if you’re interested in working with me for ten weeks. The program includes group workshopping and an individualized lesson plan for each poet. You can learn more and apply here.

You can also listen to my rundown of…unique movie awards of 2024 releases on The Gaily Show.

As always, be well and I’ll talk to you soon.